I watch too many cartoons, because I think my toddler is an evil genius who is out to get me. I must be living in some cartoon reality where I get the shit end of the stick and little wonder sprout has a unlimited credit limit with ACME.
Mothers aren't suppossed to feel that way and the screaming in my head is bound to leak out someway. It's either let it out or somehow be eaten alive. The second seed hasn't even come out yet and I already have post partum depression. Why wasn't I on birth control. Why am I still even having sex with my fertile husband.
Shaking my head doesn't provide answers. Shaking the kid, the fetus or the husband won't get me answers either. Besides, I don't really want to hurt anyone. But how does a person relieve frustration? Is there a certain amount of frustration in the world that doesn't dissolve, just gets passed on?
I don't want anti depressants, i just want to actually feel better. really feel better...
Saturday, July 26, 2008
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